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Wednesday, April 25, 2012

My Nose is Too Big....

Well, something I've been thinking about... When I was younger, at about the age of 13, I was sent to live with my dad (Kevin-everyone who knows me well, knows that I call him by his name.) Anyways, there was this one day (and not at band camp-;) that I was reading a magazine article. The person who had written it had titled that article "My nose is too big". (The article was about being comfortable in your own skin, which I was at the time and am today.) Kevin asked me if I thought I had a big nose, and of course (like every snarky teenager-with a roll of my eyes) I answered "no". Then he proceeded to ask me if I knew what anorexia was, and with the same response I said "yes-it's where you starve yourself." Kevin asked me if I was, well at this time I wasn't and I hadn't even thought of it. What was going on? I was living off of cereal (for eight weeks to be exact-this is why I to this day will not eat cereal). See, I hadn't discovered my love of cooking or even been taken over by the control I felt that I needed in life/food. I was 13, and sent to live with a parent who still wanted me to be 3. My step-mom wasn't always responsive when I asked for food to be put off to the side before the spam (I won't even call it meat) was added to the noodle dish, in fact she would tell me "oh, I forgot" and then giggle. See, by the time I turned 13, I had already been a vegetarian for a little less then a year. (I did a project on vegetarianism when I was 12 and it was pretty easy making the switch.) Kevin being the meat eater that he is, didn't approve of this (or in my mind I felt this way). If I wanted something, food, water, clothes-I had to pay for it myself. So being 13, I would have the usual babysitting job and my mom would send me money-not knowing the full extent of the situation. This would make one hurt, however, I turned it around (years later, of course). I've always looked at Kevin and my mom being people first before they are parents, this is healthy for any relationship one will have.

1 comment:

  1. What does not kill you, makes you stronger - you my darling child are a survivor - out of ashes, comes beauty... Love you, Mom.